Fame

"She's lying to you, detective, right through her pale yellow teeth," Georgie hissed. A thin stream of spittle flew out of his mouth, swung around, and smacked into his cheek.

"Easy, guv," purred the drowned rat who sat on the other side of the interrogation table.

Detective Hayes huffed an insufferable sigh. "Yes, thank you, Georgie. Why don't you go to the cafeteria for a nice hot plate of spam, while I speak with Miss...um..."

"Witch. Miss Witch," the girl supplied.

"Yes, thank you, Miss Witch," Hayes nodded.

"I'm not really a witch, you know," she continued. "They just call me one 'cause I weigh the same as a duck."

Sputtering, Georgie pointed at the witch, his finger shaking with fury. "You turned me into a newt!"

"Well, it looks as though you got better," Hayes said loudly, prodding Georgie out the door amid his stammers. "Yes, thank you. Good-bye." Hayes sat back down at the interrogation table.

"I come from a very respectable family," Miss Witch said, "the Brook-Hamsters."

"Ah, yes, your brother works at the Ministry of Silly Walks, am I right?"

She sighed, "Yes, and my eldest brother, Gervais, was the Upper-Class Twit of the Year. We are all so proud of him. He is our claim to fame, you know."

"Very nice," Hayes smiled politely before clearing his throat. He opened a folder that lay on the table and skimmed it over. "Now, what can you tell me about this dead parrot?"

Miss Brook-Hamster gasped. "I had no part in that incident."

"You did. It says so right here."

"I didn't."

"Did."

"Didn't!"

"Did!"

"Look, matey, I didn't come here for an argument," She stood, pushing the chair out with a loud scrape.

Suddenly, the door crashed open, and a policeman in a trench coat entered. "Alright, alright, allow me to introduce myself. I am Inspector Fox from the Light Entertainment Police, Comedy division, Special Flying Squad. Everyone is this room is hereby charged under Section B12 with involvement in a strange prompt, that being a prompt, short story, or piece of written work intended to cause grievous mental confusions to the online public."

Bethany Bachman writes in Philadelphia and dedicates this prompt to Monty Python fans everywhere.

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